disappointment

Want to be disappointed? Try copying someone you admire. Imagine yourself painting a picture, strumming a guitar, or sinking a putt just like the pros. But most of the time, you discover that you can’t do what they do. At least not at their level. And not now. Maybe never.

A few days ago, our church hosted a security seminar to help children’s ministry workers safeguard the Sunday School rooms from intruders. A police officer and a martial artist taught us how to deal with unruly people. The meeting included some physical training but I couldn’t help thinking about the YouTube videos I’d seen of martial artists and boxers–accomplished fighters. I wished I could think, strike, or block just like them, but I knew I couldn’t. The black belt and the cop impressed me; my own abilities–not so much!

Pastor Steve Furtick recommends that “we [not] compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” Professionals practice. It takes a lot of private work to help you succeed in public. So don’t worry if your rehearsals don’t match on-stage productions. That’s pointless frustration.

Yet one of the best ways to learn is to copy masters. Not just in matters of security, but in every area of life, including spiritual development. If you want to grow as a disciple of Jesus Christ, consider the value of imitation.

• 1 Corinthians 4:16 – “Therefore I urge you to imitate me.”

• 1 Corinthians 11:1 – “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ.”

• Ephesians 5:1 – “Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children.”

• Philippians 3:17 – “Join together in following my example, brothers and sisters, and just as you have us as a model, keep your eyes on those who live as we do.”

• 1 Peter 2:21 – “To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in His steps.”

• 3 John 11 – “Dear friend, do not imitate what is evil but what is good. Anyone who does what is good is from God. Anyone who does what is evil has not seen God.”

The problem with imitation is that the people we imitate are good at what they do and we’re not. So when we try to duplicate their accomplishments, we fall short. We feel wonderful when we observe them but worse when we give it a shot.

But it’s how we learn. Author Pema Chodron teaches that “Feelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy, and fear, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that teach us where it is that we’re holding back. They teach us to perk up and lean in when we feel we’d rather collapse and back away. They’re like messengers that show us, with terrifying clarity, exactly where we’re stuck. This very moment is the perfect teacher, and, lucky for us, it’s with us wherever we are.”

Are you up for this kind of education? Rather than hiding from despondency, face it. Your personal growth depends on your willingness and ability to work with it. Comedian Conan O’Brien “told graduates to not be afraid to fail, and I still believe that. But today I tell you that whether you fear it or not, disappointment will come. The beauty is that through disappointment you can gain clarity, and with clarity comes conviction and true originality.”

So go ahead, imitate the masters. When you do, you’ll feel disappointment–guaranteed! But remember that you’re learning, you’re growing, you’re changing for the better.

Don’t fear the hurt; use it to press on to being who God called you to be.

An original.